Thursday, January 22, 2015

Boyah... new book store!


This here is a fine book store. Leigh's Favorite Books has some great books. And my book just got added to their bookshelves. 


You can find it right next to Harry Potter.


Best part is, it's right next door to Bookasaurus. 


So if you want to pick up some kids books, go next door and get your youngens some good stories. 






Sunday, January 18, 2015

Couple things ya'll ought to know...


Here's 4 things I think ya'll ought to know that will help you:

1) Don't devalue yourself. I know it's easy to focus on your weaknesses, but ya'll gotta try and focus on your strengths. Christopher Columbus never would have made it to the America's with doubt in his sails. John Wayne once said, "Life is hard. It's even harder when you're stupid!" Being stupid is telling yourself what you suck at 24/7. Just don't do it. If you want to discover the America's, you gotta have an unyielding belief... some call that faith.

2) Know what opportunity looks like. I bet when Steve Jobs and Bill Gates was first starting out, no one knew how successful them boys was going to be. In fact, if you look at their pictures in their youth, them fellas look like a couple damn hippies. I bet no one knew that opportunity for Steve Jobs was going to India for a year. I bet even fewer people knew what opportunity looked like when he got back and got to work on keyboards in his garage. I bet people started seeing opportunity when it moved out of the garage, got an investor, and started making mad sales. I bet folks truly knew what it looked like when it was in a four story building and cruising in a BMW. By then, most people who could have made mad wealth were gone. They already made their mind up on who Steve Jobs was and that opportunity just passed them by. Same story goes for Bill Gates. When he dropped out of Harvard and moved into a motel in New Mexico, I bet he never thought he would be one of Harvard's most successful Alumni. I bet people around him thought he was crazy, but the truth is, those who knew he wasn't harnessed that opportunity and made mad money doing it. Point of all this... don't judge a book by it's cover!

3) Build value where value players exist. I got a lot of people telling me I aint never going to be able to get my book on a shelf. Them are folks I won't never work with. It's like Joe Dirt said, "you can't have no in your heart!" What if Thomas Edison had no in his heart? Think the light bulb would have got invented? Or motion pictures? Or the radio? Or most electronic devices? Aint now way! Even cell phones require a battery.

4) When you find value players, build value with them. All these men I've highlighted had value. Someone saw their vision and built value with them. By value, I mean if Thomas Edison is working on something called a light bulb and needs zinc and glass, you get that man zinc and glass. If Steve Jobs has a vision about a touch screen device that does a gazillion things, you best start seeing what he's projecting, lest opportunity pass you up. If a nerdy little Harvard dropout starts talking about something crazy called software, I highly suggest you learn about it and get the man what he needs. Course this is hindsight and I know ya'll are going to say it's impossible to know, but the truth is, some people knew and built a crap ton of wealth. That right there is what I'm talking about!

Whew, that was a mouth full. I gotta go, but I hope ya'll like what we talked about here. Go check out my book! Prince & Princess.






Tuesday, January 6, 2015

New Years... shmoe years...



I don't give no two craps about New Years. Sure it's tons of fun drinking yourself stupid. It's also bunches of fun getting the beer goggles on and kissing some random chick! But since I aint been able to do that in years, I'm gonna have to say... it sorta sucks! However, in that righteous spirit of setting goals, I got some new ones. Please see below:

1) Re-evaluate my position on God (Audrey is a might convincing)

2) Let my daughter know I love her (even if she aint really my daughter)

3) Get my book in every bookstore and supermarket on either side of the Mississippi.

4) Make bank selling my books on Amazon.

5) Drink less... fish more!

Pretty short list, but goals is hard to make and harder to keep. I think I'll keep it loosey goosey! Have a good un!

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Christmas... Bah! Humbug!


I aint exactly one for Christmas. It just seems like such a crock. Here are a couple of good reasons why I aint a Holiday cheer mister. 
1) If you are Christian, and you read them scriptures, answer me how lambs was being born in the winter. It just don't happen. For that reason, it's pretty dang obvious this holiday is celebrated at a time when it shouldn't be. Don't that seem obvious Christmas is a fraud? 

2) Santa Claus. I aint gonna dive too deep into this one, but come on ya'll. Does it seem right we push Mr. C on kids? I don't really think so. Course, if he'd bring me a gift, I might change my mind. 

3) Corporations and Government need a holiday to stimulate the economy. I mean heck, most businesses project future earnings based off Christmas sales right? Don't that say it's all about the Benjamin's and not about Christ?

For these reasons, I'm not a huge fan of Christmas. Course that don't stop Pablo and Audrey from celebrating, but as far as this grinch is concerned... I aint a believer. That's not to say Nerd Chick aint hard at work. If you look below, I did get a gift from that beautiful girl who is a Nerd... and a Chick. Check it out... If ya'll live in the Berkley area, you can go and get my book at Pegasus now. I can't tell you how glad I am that Pegasus in my book is at Pegasus book stores! That freaking rocks! 


Pretty easy to see this joint from the street. Just look for a big orange banner.  


I really like their brand! I wish Nerd Chick would have shot me a pic of this neon sign at night. 


Anyway, just go on in and you'll see it right next to them Harry Potter books. Have yew a good un and remember...


Friday, December 12, 2014

Bustin through the ice...


Pablo cracks me up. This dude does the craziest things. I'm gonna narrate this fine specimen like the discovery channel does with wild animal shows. Just read the following with a british accent:



Here we have Pablo, a man of mystery and adventure. This fine specimen falls into the category of "lone wanderer." He fancies travel, warm meals, and dry places to rest his weary head. Though seemingly lost, Pablo is never lost. When asked where he is he always responds with a sure answer, "America!" With a thick hispanic accent and features to match many south Americans, one might think Pablo is from South or Central America. A fun fact about this type of wanderer is that you will be hard pressed to discover his native lands. When asked where he's from, he responds, "South of here." A fine specimen of this sort will never reveal his actual origins for fear of deportation. Same goes for his present local.  


Here we  see the determined man forming a circle in the ice. Why would this man of wonder pound through the ice? Perhaps he is driven by hunger? After all, wanderers such as him feed off a steady diet of fish. Or perhaps he wants to take a bath? Or maybe he is driven by fear? One can only imagine what is running through Pablo's mind as he hacks his way through the frozen layers.


Determined as ever, the flannel back will repeat blow after blow, while others around him use more efficient devices like gas powered ice drills. None the less, the proud male chipperly chips, and chips away. 


When his metal hatchet fails him, he resorts to other hard objects like rocks. However, Pablo soon learns that ice on a lake can freeze deeper than four inches. 


After a quick assessment, the determined hacker seems proud of the circle that has not punched through the ice nor does it seem to serve any purpose. What could be this man's motive? Is he making art? Does this hole serve some grand ritual purpose?


YES! YES IT DOES! While the rest of us fish for food, and struggle to survive... Pablo fishes for ice cold beer. I can never actually tell if he's just foolin' around or if his meanderings have purpose. As you can see in this instance, Pablo's got purpose... ice cold beer. Until we meet next week...






Thursday, November 27, 2014

Happy Thanks Giving ya'll!


From Audrey, Pablo, and Me. Ya'll been real good to us this year. I got so much to be thankful for. I met my daughter, got my book together, got it on a shelf. Best part is yet to come. I got some big news, but I don't want to take away from this very important holiday. Hope ya'll enjoy time with your family, check out the history of thanks givin. Have a good un and till we meet again, keep on keepin on!

Monday, November 10, 2014

TOTES


Anyone ever heard a young girl say, "totes?" I had no earthly idea what that meant. Audrey says that to everything. She'll be on her phone and start saying, "totes, totes, I totes agree!" At first, I thought she was talking about her tater tots.  I mean everyone has a favorite food, but it just didn't seem right that a young girl would be talking that much about tater tots. When Pablo started saying, "totes" to everything, it was then that I realized, she wasn't talking bout no tater tots. I confronted her and asked her what in the heck, "totes," meant and she laughed at me. She laughed so hard she made Pablo laugh. Both them was making such a ruckus neither of them could tell me what the totes was totes going on. So I got on the internet and this is what I found, "TOTEs: is an abbreviation youngens use for 'totally.'" It's like them valley girls back in the 90's runnin around and sayin, "like, totally." Except Audrey aint takin to flipping her hair yet, so I guess it's a might different. Anywho, I totes hope ya'll understand what the totes I'm talkin about. And in the event you don't, totes off!

TOTES GETTA BOOK!

Friday, November 7, 2014

Trenching...




I am mighty certain many of you folks are wondering where I'm going with this. Well, for those of you who aint from the south, you may not have an affection for crawfish, but where I been down in the dirty south, they take them water bugs (in the west they call them craw dads) mix them with some amazing seasonings, boil them up, and make the most nasty looking water bugs taste amazing! I aint joking neither.
Anywho, the other day, I was sharing some of my southern culture with Audrey and Pablo. Course Pablo aint really one for bugs, he flails his hands and gags when I eat them craw fish. Audrey on the other hand didn't believe me. So I taught her how to trench. Here's what ya'll need to know about trenching, tie a fishing line with three or four hooks on it. Then take a really greasy piece of bacon and snag it on each hook. Once you've set your line, try trench in clear waters so you can see them water bugs come out of their holes and latch onto your bacon. But if all you got is muddy water like the Mississippi, then what you do is pull your line up on occasion to check it out. Now I aint never seen a water bug that could refuse a good piece of bacon, so you should have no problem getting craw fish. Once you get your score, throw 'em in the pot, add a little cajun spice, tabasco sauce, 1 egg, a pinch of coco, tuna fish oil, and a couple of strips of bacon. Don't pay no mind if them water bugs starts hissing, that's just what they do before they turn bright red and roast out. 
Now you gotta figure out how to eat them red devils. This here is where I lost Audrey. She don't like watching me tear their tails off and chew them up, but that's how it's done. Sides, once they are boiled, them tails come right off. All thats left is cracking them claws open and sucking that tender meat.  Give it a go and let me know.

GETTA BOOK!

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Well here's a mystery for ya'll...


Nerd chick can't remember where this place is. She didn't get a business card and she don't remember where the heck this store is. Kind of funny the name of it is Book Shop. I mean it makes sense you'd lose a book at a place called, "Book Shop." Me and Pablo's laughing so hard over this one, we'll just leave it up to ya'll to find it. Hope ya'll enjoy Prince & Princess, Book Shop! Guess I'll catch you on volume II!


Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Hot dang...


Nerd Chick is on a roll. She got my book in another book store. This one here is called Towne Center Books. You can find it @ 555 Main St. Pleasanton, CA, 94566


This store is just so darn quaint. I'm so grateful to the owner, for putting me in her pleasant little store in Pleasanton. Just look at them autumn leaves. When you get tired of that, just go on ahead and walk through that candy red door. 


This is a fine picture of the inside of the store. If you go on down that hall, you'll find a new stand. 


The book is on a shelf right there waiting for you to buy it. Hope ya'll get there before them books are gone. Get on down there and GETTA BOOK! Give 'em a call to reserve your copy, (925)-846-8826