Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Christmas... Bah! Humbug!

I aint exactly one for Christmas. It just seems like such a crock. Here are a couple of good reasons why I aint a Holiday cheer mister. 
1) If you are Christian, and you read them scriptures, answer me how lambs was being born in the winter. It just don't happen. For that reason, it's pretty dang obvious this holiday is celebrated at a time when it shouldn't be. Don't that seem obvious Christmas is a fraud? 

2) Santa Claus. I aint gonna dive too deep into this one, but come on ya'll. Does it seem right we push Mr. C on kids? I don't really think so. Course, if he'd bring me a gift, I might change my mind. 

3) Corporations and Government need a holiday to stimulate the economy. I mean heck, most businesses project future earnings based off Christmas sales right? Don't that say it's all about the Benjamin's and not about Christ?

For these reasons, I'm not a huge fan of Christmas. Course that don't stop Pablo from celebrating, but as far as this grinch is concerned... I aint a believer. That's not to say Nerd Chick aint hard at work. If you look below, I did get a gift from that beautiful girl who is a Nerd... and a Chick. Check it out... If ya'll live in the Berkley area, you can go and get my book at Pegasus now. I can't tell you how glad I am that Pegasus in my book is at Pegasus book stores! That freaking rocks! 

Pretty easy to see this joint from the street. Just look for a big orange banner.  

I really like their brand! I wish Nerd Chick would have shot me a pic of this neon sign at night. 

Anyway, just go on in and you'll see it right next to them Harry Potter books. Have yew a good un and remember...

Friday, December 12, 2014

Bustin through the ice...

Pablo cracks me up. This dude does the craziest things. I'm gonna narrate this fine specimen like the discovery channel does with wild animal shows. Just read the following with a british accent:

Here we have Pablo, a man of mystery and adventure. This fine specimen falls into the category of "lone wanderer." He fancies travel, warm meals, and dry places to rest his weary head. Though seemingly lost, Pablo is never lost. When asked where he is he always responds with a sure answer, "America!" With a thick hispanic accent and features to match many south Americans, one might think Pablo is from South or Central America. A fun fact about this type of wanderer is that you will be hard pressed to discover his native lands. When asked where he's from, he responds, "South of here." A fine specimen of this sort will never reveal his actual origins for fear of deportation. Same goes for his present local.  

Here we  see the determined man forming a circle in the ice. Why would this man of wonder pound through the ice? Perhaps he is driven by hunger? After all, wanderers such as him feed off a steady diet of fish. Or perhaps he wants to take a bath? Or maybe he is driven by fear? One can only imagine what is running through Pablo's mind as he hacks his way through the frozen layers.

Determined as ever, the flannel back will repeat blow after blow, while others around him use more efficient devices like gas powered ice drills. None the less, the proud male chipperly chips, and chips away. 

When his metal hatchet fails him, he resorts to other hard objects like rocks. However, Pablo soon learns that ice on a lake can freeze deeper than four inches. 

After a quick assessment, the determined hacker seems proud of the circle that has not punched through the ice nor does it seem to serve any purpose. What could be this man's motive? Is he making art? Does this hole serve some grand ritual purpose?

YES! YES IT DOES! While the rest of us fish for food, and struggle to survive... Pablo fishes for ice cold beer. I can never actually tell if he's just foolin' around or if his meanderings have purpose. As you can see in this instance, Pablo's got purpose... ice cold beer. Until we meet next week...

Friday, November 7, 2014


I am mighty certain many of you folks are wondering where I'm going with this. Well, for those of you who aint from the south, you may not have an affection for crawfish, but where I been down in the dirty south, they take them water bugs (in the west they call them craw dads) mix them with some amazing seasonings, boil them up, and make the most nasty looking water bugs taste amazing! I aint joking neither.
Anywho, the other day, I was sharing some of my southern culture with Audrey and Pablo. Course Pablo aint really one for bugs, he flails his hands and gags when I eat them craw fish. Audrey on the other hand didn't believe me. So I taught her how to trench. Here's what ya'll need to know about trenching, tie a fishing line with three or four hooks on it. Then take a really greasy piece of bacon and snag it on each hook. Once you've set your line, try trench in clear waters so you can see them water bugs come out of their holes and latch onto your bacon. But if all you got is muddy water like the Mississippi, then what you do is pull your line up on occasion to check it out. Now I aint never seen a water bug that could refuse a good piece of bacon, so you should have no problem getting craw fish. Once you get your score, throw 'em in the pot, add a little cajun spice, tabasco sauce, 1 egg, a pinch of coco, tuna fish oil, and a couple of strips of bacon. Don't pay no mind if them water bugs starts hissing, that's just what they do before they turn bright red and roast out. 
Now you gotta figure out how to eat them red devils. This here is where I lost Audrey. She don't like watching me tear their tails off and chew them up, but that's how it's done. Sides, once they are boiled, them tails come right off. All thats left is cracking them claws open and sucking that tender meat.  Give it a go and let me know.


Thursday, November 6, 2014

Well here's a mystery for ya'll...

Nerd chick can't remember where this place is. She didn't get a business card and she don't remember where the heck this store is. Kind of funny the name of it is Book Shop. I mean it makes sense you'd lose a book at a place called, "Book Shop." Me and Pablo's laughing so hard over this one, we'll just leave it up to ya'll to find it. Hope ya'll enjoy Prince & Princess, Book Shop! Guess I'll catch you on volume II!

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Hot dang...

Nerd Chick is on a roll. She got my book in another book store. This one here is called Towne Center Books. You can find it @ 555 Main St. Pleasanton, CA, 94566

This store is just so darn quaint. I'm so grateful to the owner, for putting me in her pleasant little store in Pleasanton. Just look at them autumn leaves. When you get tired of that, just go on ahead and walk through that candy red door. 

This is a fine picture of the inside of the store. If you go on down that hall, you'll find a new stand. 

The book is on a shelf right there waiting for you to buy it. Hope ya'll get there before them books are gone. Get on down there and GETTA BOOK! Give 'em a call to reserve your copy, (925)-846-8826

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

HOLY CRAP! Books Inc. Shelved my book!

Man, can ya'll believe I'm getting into so many book stores? This sweet little spot can be found @ 1344 Park Street Alameda, CA, 94501

I know these aint the best pictures, but that's what Nerd Chick sent me, so this all I got. See if you can spot P&P on the shelf. 

Or just give them a call @ (510)522-2226

Monday, November 3, 2014

Got a new book store!

Boyah! Nerd chick is on some sort of book rampage! Like a T-rex, she's out there tearin it up! Go nothing but love for ya Nerd Chick! Check out her latest kill. 

What can I say? Nerd Chick is good at placing books, not taking pictures. The pic got cut short. The sign should read, "Bay Books, New Used Rare" and you can find this charming little store @ 2415 San Ramon Valley Blvd, #3, San Ramon, CA, 94583. 

Anywho, go on through the front door. It should look like this on the inside. 

Ask for an energetic book enthusiast named Rose. This is her below.

If Rose aint there, you'll find the book on the shelf in the fantasy section. See image below. 

What are ya'll waiting for? Get on down there and GETTA BOOK!

Friday, October 31, 2014

Things that make you go boom

Da, da, da, da... Happy Halloween! Pablo dressed up as... well himself. Did I mention that I love 80's music? Of course you can see that my costume is an 80's rocker. Well maybe more like Jewel. Anyway, 80's is totes the best! It doesn't sound anything like music today. It's got all kinds of umph! I just created an 80's channel on Pandora. If you haven't, you should check out Madonna, Boyz II Men, Duran Duran, Skid Row, Guns N' Roses (love November Rain), ACDC, and Aerosmith. These guys really knew how to rock back in their day. I ask my Dad what he thinks about these bands, and he says every chance he got, he went to a rock concert. Those were truly the days. By now you've seen all the hard work I've done for my Dad. Not sure how I did it, but I managed to get his book published. This is really exciting for us! I hope you guys like it. Feel free to keep on emailing me at audgepodge500@gmail.com. Keep rocking and don't let your body stop dropping (that's an 80's line-- so funny.) xoxo Audge

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Go to Peunia's Place, "Fine Books for Children & Young Adults..."

And GETTA BOOK! Check it out ya'll, I just got my book in this here book store. 

6027 N Palm Ave
 Fresno, CA
(559) 438-1561

Just so ya'll know, Nerd chick says  this is a fantastic place to GETTA BOOK!

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Got my book in another book store!

Nerd Chick is the freaking bomb! Check it out, she got my book in, "The Last Book Store." 

453 South Spring St. Ground Floor
Downtown LA

Just walk on past the window...

Step through the door...

Look to your right... and bam, right there from the ground up on the third shelf is mah book!

This place is freaking awesome. Plenty of room to grab a chill pad and read P&P Have yew a good one and stay tuned for the next exciting location!

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Got my book in a store!

That's right ya'll! Nerd chick been tearin it up out there in Southern California. She shot me this picture of a pink barracks, where a book store called, "The Yellow Book Road," is. 

In case you couldn't tell, that's Barracks #15 @ 2750 Historic Decatur Road • San Diego, CA 92106
Liberty Station – NTC – Point Loma – aka Barracks 15 (619)955-5188
 Apparently Marines are made real close to there. Kind of hard to believe that the worlds most lethal warriors are manufactured just a stones throw away from them pink barracks. Boyah boys! Anywho, a sweet old gal named Ann owns the joint. 

Ann sure does love books. In fact, she loves P&P! Who the heck wouldn't? It's only the best dang fantasy book on the shelf. Least that's what I think anyways. Well, be sure to drop on by, say, "Hi Ann, GETTA BOOK!" and see if you can get her to get you a copy of, "Prince & Princess, Into The Shadows." Have ya'll a good one!

Saturday, October 4, 2014

Even a blind squirrel gets a nut!

Well ya'll aint never going to believe this. Nerd Chick got me into a bookstore. And not just any book store, "Book Soup" in Hollywood. Here's what I want ya'll to do if you live in the LA area. Get on down to

Book Soup
8818 Sunset Blvd.
West Hollywood, CA 90069

Walk on through the front door, peel around the back.

Go say, "Hi to Ginger," and say just these two words, "GETTA BOOK!"

She'll show ya right where the young adult section is and right where P&P is. Shouldn't be too hard to find, it's right next to Harry Potter. 

While she was down there, Nerd Chick bumped into Stephen King. I don't think she's one to lie, so I believe he was there and such. Anywho, it's a super famous bookstore, so I hope ya'll have an equally good experience.

Friday, October 3, 2014

Guess who got a copy of New Moon

Is me... Pablo! So.... I don't really like this book so far, because Edward leaves Bella and Jacob picks her up. Why the crap does Jacob get Bella? Is this even worth reading? I am 100% team Edward!


Monday, September 29, 2014

Prince & Princess is like Heinz ketchup...

Good things come to those who wait!

The moment I never thought would come, has finally arrived. My book is finished and ready for sale! Can't believe it took dang near a year to write this thing and although it's the most difficult task I've ever under taken, I'd say it's darn worth it! I'm sure most you are like, "yeah, we know you gotta book, you been posting it all over them comicon pictures." To that I must say, it wasn't actually my book, that was just a rough draft that got worked up. You know it was a fake cause the back says, "PROOF". Which according to Nerd Chick isn't proof you have a book, it's a "proof read."

Anywho, I got me a published book with my name on it. My blood sweat and tears went into this here and Nerd Chick done helped put it together. Thank you Nerd Chick! Your the best Nerd whose a chick I ever known. Pablo and I are singing your praises and dancing the la cooka rocha around the book!

He especially likes this part.

I aint never seen Pablo dance like that. Didn't tell him and Moonshine (God bless you where ere you are) that I decided to put their pic in the back of the book. Them fella's has been such an inspiration to me and I mean heck, they been along for most of the ride. The day we took this pic, was a special moment to me. We survived the winter and I aint never going to forget all these fellas has done for me. Just seemed like they should be apart of it. 

   Any o'l who, every party has to get crashed, which is apparently my daughter Audrey's job. She killed the mood by asking, "how do we sell it?" That right there is a dang good question. How do you sell this here book? Anyone got any ideas?


Friday, September 26, 2014


Now that the ice bucket challenge is long over, I got to thinking... What if I could do something like that for my book? By that I mean, what if I could start a campaign that got people to buy my book? So instead of dumping ice on your head and challenging each other to freeze yourselves to dang near death, what if ya'll challenged each other to read a book? Doesn't have to be my book, but it would be pretty dang cool if it was! I imagine my social media campaign would go something like this.

ME: "Hey Joker!"

JOKER: "Yessss?"


JOKER: "Oh, well since you put it that way..."

JOKERS GIRLFRIEND: "We gotta book!" 

Pablo: "Be like Joker and his woman, GETTA BOOK!"

I think this will totally work! Have a good one ya'll and in case ya forgot: GETTA BOOK HERE: P&P

Monday, September 15, 2014

Setchra, the mermaid...

Mermaid from Comic Con

I get asked a crap ton of questions where I came up with Setchra, the mermaid. It all came about when I was a young boy. As I said awhile ago, I lived with a woman on the mississippi river. This kind lady referred to herself as the lady of the lake. She practically raised me. Her name was Ms. M. She was a good woman. A hard working woman who was as kind as heaven itself. Ms. M used to tell me, that if I was a good boy, beautiful mermaids from the caribbean would swim up that great mississippi river, crawl along the banks, and deposit shiny pennies for me to find. She sold me that tale a thousand times. And I bought, every time. Ms. M would say, "they'll be coming for you cause I toss berries in the river and they love berries." I asked how the mermaids might know if I was good? Ms. M said, "I won't toss the berries if you aren't good and they won't leave those gorgeous copper pennies." I said, "I could just toss the berries in there myself. In fact, I could toss more than you! Then they'd bring me more pennies." To which that wise woman responded, "Sure you could do that, if you knew which ones." Ms. M always had the upper hand on me. I didn't always find pennies along the banks, but when I did, I knew it was cause I was a good boy. When I asked Ms. M about the mermaids, she described them same as I did. My mind would grow insatiable, and  I would pepper Ms. M up with questions and exhaust that sweet old woman's brain. I always knew when she reached her end cause she'd say, "Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera." Hence, you have Setchra. And if ya'll ask me any more, I'll say, "etcetera, etcetera, etcetera."

Friday, September 12, 2014

The odd ducks of comic con...

Not really sure how to classify this next one, therefore, I dub it, "the odd duck costumes of comic con". To set a standard for what is an odd duck and what isn't, let's begin with Dead Pool Gandalf, which you can clearly see below.

This man obviously combined costumes, but just to be sure, I asked him if he killed Gandalf and wore his beard, cape, and took his staff. He stuttered a bunch, but eventually confirmed that he was in fact trying to combine outfits. So clearly, he is not an odd duck. The young woman in the picture below on the other hand...

...is clearly an odd duck! Who or what in the heck is she? She looks normal, but she's wearing a red scarf. When asked what her character was, she couldn't tell me because I didn't recognize her. She qualifies as an odd duck.

These two stunning ladies definitely qualify as odd ducks!

I aint sure what this little girl was supposed to be. She got a unicorn horn, and angel wings, but her green hair threw me. Is she a Unicorn angel or something? Anywho, she put a lot of work into her costume, so she gets an A+ in my book... but she is certainly an odd duck.

I aint exactly sure what this critter is supposed to be. I put him in the demon category, but apparently that's wrong. He's some character from some internet thing. Anywho, he's definitely an odd duck! Mostly cause he aint got no eyes.

This pic is just to get you back to zero. She aint an odd duck, but I aint exactly sure who she's supposed to be. I guess she's the female version of captain hook, but without the hook. Anywho, she's hot so that disqualifies her from odd duckdom.

I love this pic. Something about blue hair makes me laugh. All giggles aside though, she's an odd duck because I have no freaking clue who she is!

I aint exactly sure who this chick is, but she walked around with Zelda all day, so I assume she's got something to do with that. She's definitely an odd duck!

I aint exactly sure who this chick is either, but any chick that carries around a Samurai sword in a navy chick suit is a-ok in my book. And since she's carrying my book, that makes her double ok. Anywho, them are the odd ducks of comic con. Enjoy! And if you aint got my book yet, get to gettin: Prince & Prince, Into the Shadows